Skip to main navigation menu Skip to main content Skip to site footer
FrancoAngeli Journals

Tema

No. 1 (2025): Snodi dell’infanzia: Tempi del soggetto, Tempi della cura

Between desire, origin, and recognition. A psychoanalytic reflection on same-sex parenthood starting from Marta and Claudia’s story

  • Nicola Carone
  • Laura Porzio Giusto
DOI
https://doi.org/10.3280/gruoa1-2025oa23410
Submitted
luglio 31, 2026
Published
2026-09-21

Abstract

 

The article offers a psychoanalytic reflection on same-gender parenthood starting from the story of Marta and Claudia, a couple of mothers who had a daughter through ART with egg donation abroad. Weaving together empirical research, psychoana-lytic theory, and clinical narrative, the paper explores the key nodes characterizing same-gender parent families: the internal representation of the birth other, Oedipal triangulation beyond anatomical difference, disclosure of origins, legal recognition, and mental health professionals’ implicit bias. The central argument is that contain-ing and normative-differentiating parental functions are mental operations rather than biological roles, and that the quality of parents’ psychological elaboration, more than their gender composition, is the most predictive variable of children’s wellbe-ing. Similarities and differences between same-gender and heterosexual couples ac-cessing ART are also discussed, with particular attention to the truth about origins and the trauma of reproductive mobility.

References

  1. Berger R. e Paul M. (2008). Family Secrets and Family Functioning: The Case of Donor Assistance. Family Process, 47, 4: 553-566.
  2. DOI: 10.1111/j.1545-5300.2008.00271.x
  3. Carone N. (2016). In origine è il dono. Donatori e portatrici nell’immaginario delle famiglie omogenitoriali. Milano: Il Saggiatore.
  4. Carone N. (2021). Le famiglie omogenitoriali. Teorie, clinica e ricerca. Milano: Raf-faello Cortina.
  5. Carone N., Cruciani G., Quintigliano M., Baiocco R. e Lingiardi V. (2025a). Child Psychological Adjustment in Planned Gay Father Families: A Meta-Analysis. Sexuality Research and Social Policy, 22, 2: 1022-1042.
  6. DOI: 10.1007/s13178-024-01001-7
  7. Carone N., Innocenzi E. e Lingiardi V. (2025b). Microaggressions and Dropout when Working with Sexual Minority Parents in Clinical Settings: The Working Alliance as a Mediating Mechanism. Psychology of Sexual Orientation and Gen-der Diversity, 12, 1: 113-122.
  8. DOI: 10.1037/sgd0000702
  9. Carone N., Manzi D., Barone L., Mirabella M., Speranza A.M., Baiocco R. e Lingi-ardi V. (2024). Disclosure and Child Exploration of Surrogacy Origins in Gay Father Families: Fathers’ Adult Attachment Interview Coherence of Mind Mat-ters. J. of Reproductive and Infant Psychology, 42, 5: 977-992.
  10. DOI: 10.1080/02646838.2023.2218598
  11. Carone N., Mirabella M., Innocenzi E., Quintigliano M., Antoniucci C., Manzi D., For-tunato A., Giovanardi G., Speranza A.M. e Lingiardi V. (2023). The Intergenera-tional Transmission of Attachment during Middle Childhood in Lesbian, Gay and Heterosexual Parent Families through Assisted Reproduction: The Mediating Role of Reflective Functioning. Attachment & Human Development, 25, 6: 600-622.
  12. DOI: 10.1080/14616734.2023.2292053
  13. Corbett K. (2001). Nontraditional Family Romance. Psychoanalytic Quarterly, 70, 3: 599-624.
  14. DOI: 10.1002/j.2167-4086.2001.tb00609.x
  15. Ehrensaft D. (2005). Mommies, Daddies, Donors, Surrogates: Answering tough Questions and Building strong Families. New York: Guilford Press.
  16. Ehrensaft D. (2008). When Baby makes Three or Four or More: Attachment, Indi-viduation, and Identity in Assisted-Conception Families. Psychoanalytic Study of the Child, 63, 1: 3-23.
  17. DOI: 10.1080/00797308.2008.11800798.
  18. Ehrensaft D. (2016). Dai triangoli edipici ai complessi familiari. Giornale Italiano di Psicologia, XLIII, 1-2: 129-132.
  19. DOI: 10.1421/83662
  20. Ferrari F. (2016). L’intervento psicologico nel sostegno delle buone prassi. In: Everri M., a cura di, Genitori come gli altri e tra gli altri. Milano-Udine: Mimesis.
  21. Fonagy P., Gergely G., Jurist E.L. e Target M. (2002). Affect Regulation, Mentali-zation, and the Development of the Self. New York: Other Press.
  22. Freud S. (1909). Il romanzo familiare dei nevrotici. OSF, 5. Torino: Bollati Boringhieri, 1972. Ginzburg N. (1963). Lessico famigliare. Torino: Einaudi.
  23. Goldberg A.E. (2010). Lesbian and Gay Parents and their Children: Research on the Family Life Cycle. Washington, DC: American Psychological Association.
  24. Goldberg A.E. e Kuvalanka K.A. (2012). Marriage (in)Equality: The Perspectives of Adolescents and Emerging Adults with Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Parents.
  25. J. of Marriage and Family, 74, 1: 34-52. DOI: 10.1111/j.1741-3737.2011.00876.x
  26. Golombok S. (2020). We are Family. What Really Matters for Parents and Fhildren.
  27. London: Scribe Publications.
  28. Golombok S., Perry B., Burston A., Murray C., Mooney-Somers J., Stevens M. e Golding J. (2003). Children with Lesbian Parents: A Community Study. Devel-opmental Psychology, 39, 1: 20-33.
  29. DOI: 10.1037/0012-1649.39.1.20
  30. Gottman J.M., Levenson R.W., Swanson C., Swanson K., Tyson R. e Yoshimoto D. (2003). Observing Gay, Lesbian and Heterosexual Couples’ Relationships: Math-ematical Modeling of Conflict Interaction. J. of Homosexuality, 45, 1: 65-91.
  31. DOI: 10.1300/J082v45n01_04
  32. Kitzinger C. e Wilkinson S. (1994). Virgins and Queers: Rehabilitating Heterosex-uality? Gender & Society, 8, 3: 444-462.
  33. DOI: 10.1177/089124394008003008
  34. Klein M. (1946). Notes on Some Schizoid Mechanisms. Int. J. of Psycho-Analysis, 27: 99-110.
  35. La Delfa G. (2016). Perché non vogliamo adottare i nostri figli. In: Everri M., a cura di, Genitori come gli altri e tra gli altri. Milano-Udine: Mimesis.
  36. Lingiardi V. e Carone N. (2019). Challenging Oedipus in Changing Families: Gender Identifications and Access to Origins in Same-Sex Parent Families Created through Third-Party Reproduction. The Int. J. of Psychoanalysis, 100, 2: 229-246.
  37. DOI: 10.1080/00207578.2019.1589383
  38. Lingiardi V., Carone N., Morelli M. e Baiocco R. (2016). “It’s a bit too Much Fa-thering this Seed”: The Meanings Attributed by Gay Fathers to Surrogacy. Re-productive BioMedicine Online, 33, 4: 412-424.
  39. DOI: 10.1016/j.rbmo.2016.07.001
  40. Lingiardi V., Nardelli N. e Drescher J. (2015). New Italian LGB Pychotherapy Guidelines: A Review. Int. Review of Psychiatry, 27, 5: 405-415.
  41. DOI: 10.3109/09540261.2015.1064215.
  42. Loewald H.W. (1980). Papers on Psychoanalysis. New Haven: Yale University Press. Main M., Kaplan N. e Cassidy J. (1985). Security in Infancy, Childhood, and Adult-hood: A Move to the Level of Representation. Monographs of the Society for
  43. Research in Child Development, 50, 1-2: 66-104. DOI: 10.2307/3333827
  44. McDougall J. (1992). A favore di una certa anormalità. Roma: Borla.
  45. Ogden T.H. (1989). Il limite primigenio dell’esperienza. Roma: Astrolabio-Ubaldini. Pachankis J.E. e Goldfried M.R. (2004). Clinical Issues in Working with Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Clients. Psychotherapy: Theory, Research, Practice, Train-
  46. ing, 41, 3: 227-246.
  47. DOI: 10.1037/0033-3204.41.3.227
  48. Patterson C.J. (2017). Parents’ Sexual Orientation and Children’s Development.
  49. Child Development Perspectives, 11, 1: 45-49. DOI: 10.1111/cdep.12207.
  50. Paul M.S. e Berger R. (2007). Topic Avoidance and Family Functioning in Families Conceived with Donor Insemination. Human Reproduction, 22, 9: 2566-2571. DOI: 10.1093/humrep/dem174
  51. Porzio Giusto L. (2019). Origini e percorsi delle famiglie omogenitoriali. Presso Centro di Psicoanalisi Romano, 27 giugno 2019, Roma. Testo disponibile al sito: https://www.centropsicoanalisiromano.it/infanzia-e-adolescenza/868-origini-e-percorsi-delle-famiglie-omogenitoriali.html (consultato il 15 maggio 2026).
  52. Porzio Giusto L. (2023). Non siete i genitori dei vostri figli. Psicoanalisi e sociale. Testo disponibile al sito: https://www.psicoanalisiesociale.it/?s=porzio&post_ type=post (consultato il 15 maggio 2026).
  53. Porzio Giusto L. e Carone N. (2023). Non parlare di... ma ascolta: uno sguardo in-formato e rispettoso sulle famiglie omogenitoriali. In: Centro Psicoanalitico di Roma, a cura di, Different Thoughts. Riflessioni su sessualità e genere (pp. 38-45). Roma: Centro Psicoanalitico di Roma.
  54. Porzio Giusto L. e Vagnarelli M. (2022). Adolescenti LGBT+ e famiglie omogenito-riali. In: Tardioli E., a cura di, Prendersi cura dei legami familiari. Roma: Alpes.
  55. Riskind R.G. e Patterson C.J. (2010). Parenting Intentions and Desires among Childless Lesbian, Gay, and Heterosexual Individuals. J. of Family Psychology, 24, 1: 78-81.
  56. DOI: 10.1037/a0017941
  57. Slade A. (2005). Parental Reflective Functioning: An Introduction. Attachment & Human Development, 7, 3: 269-281.
  58. DOI: 10.1080/14616730500245906
  59. Stern D.N. (1985). The Interpersonal World of the Infant: A View from Psychoanal-ysis and Developmental Psychology. New York: Basic Books (trad. it.: Il mondo interpersonale del bambino. Torino: Bollati Boringhieri, 1987).
  60. Stern D.N. (1995). The Motherhood Constellation: A Unified View of Parent-Infant Psychotherapy. New York: Basic Books (trad. it.: La costellazione materna. Il trattamento psicoterapeutico della coppia madre-bambino. Torino: Bollati Bo-ringhieri, 1995).
  61. Tallandini M.A., Zanchettin L., Gronchi G. e Morsan V. (2016). Parental Disclosure of Assisted Reproductive Technology (ART) Conception to their Children: A Systematic and Meta-Analytic Review. Human Reproduction, 31, 6: 1275-1287.
  62. DOI: 10.1093/humrep/dew068
  63. van Gelderen L., Gartrell N.K., Bos H.M.W., van Rooij F.B. e Hermanns J.M.A. (2012). Stigmatization and Resilience in Adolescent Children of Lesbian Moth-ers. J. of GLBT Family Studies, 8, 5: 477-496.
  64. DOI: 10.1080/1550428X.2012.729946
  65. Winnicott D.W. (1971). Playing and reality. London: Tavistock (trad. it.: Gioco e realtà. Roma: Armando, 1974).